31 December 2005

Wish you a well behaving planet

Please click to enlarge, the text is very small here
Wish you what you'd wish for yourself, Enjoy the day !

Blunt knife

30 December 2005


Chinna gave me a good subject in his comment in 'Expectation' page. I did not respond to that comment because I had a whole page for that subject on mind. Please read that comment first and continue reading the rest.

The road to Christmas is more enjoyable than Christmas itself. Waiting preparing shopping for Christmas is fun. Waiting is real Christmas, Diwali or Eid.

I don't have a passport, I don't intend to go anywhere abroad. There is so much to see in India that another 200 years are not enough for me. Believe me in my 58 years I haven't seen much. There is a world of experience yet to touch me, teach me. So much to be discovered.

I like to go to new places always. I enjoy the road, I enjoy the chaos of travel, railway stations, the struggle, I enjoy my window seat. and I enjoy the waiting. But I don't enjoy reaching. After reaching my excitement disappears, I just see, take pictures. But on the way in a train I enjoy visualising what the place is going to look like. Some times I am happy sometimes I am not. I expect the place to be like I heard or read.

I have tried not to have any expectation and failed.

My first experience of Taj Mahel was very unique.
After reading about it in school history books and seeing countless pictures over the years, the most photographed structure in the world, after reading many poems and hearing many songs on it, my expectations were touching the sky. I entered through one of the three gates. I was simply paralysed with what I saw. No picture including my own has done justice to this structure. Perhaps the only man made structure in the world on par with the splendour of nature. I did not regret not carrying a camera. Taj Mahel was million times higher than my expectations. I'll write more about Taj Mehel in Blunt knife soon

I'll continue the expectations tomorrow.

Oh my goodness, forgot to make the new year greeting.

Please click on the pictures for a full screen view. These pictures don't give you any idea of the splendour of Taj Mahel. You HAVE to be there. Being there spiritually is a big fat joke. Being there means go there and touch. Its a unique experience.

29 December 2005


Chinna called, Rauf we have internet.
I wasted no time, I was there early in the morning.
Mala gave me internet breakfast.
Like the keyboard and the computer my first internet experience was in Mala Chinna's house. I was impatient, Chinna was restless, repeated dialing.
What is this screeching noise ?
Its a modem Chinna said, through this modem you get connected to the world.
I was thinking how I would tollerate this screeching noise when I get the internet, it was getting on my nerves. I don't want the internet if this is going to be this noisy. After a long wait and couple of coffees and continuous screeching Yes said Chinna.
I did not know what was happening. Got connected. ?
YAHOO on the screen, oh! its a song I said
No Rauf, Chinna said, these are people who search things for you, any information.
so this is internet I thought Yahoo is internet.
What do you want Chinna asked.
Without thinking I said Enya
Chinna typed Enya in a box, Waited. One more coffee
Andy was there too, unlike me, he was asking sensible questions.
After a long wait, more coffee, and a couple of disconnections and reconnections, a text page appeared, beautifully designed, as expected of Enya. Now I was impatent I was afraid Andy would ask for something else, I wanted to eat every thing on the screen.I said I want to see her pictures. But they never came, got disconnected again. Chinna was frustrated. Mala was walking around just did not bother. What happened ? She asked why three of you look punctured ?

Much against Chinna's advise I got the internet after a few months. He knew I'll get stuck with fat telephone bills.
I got stuck with fat telephone bills.
It took 3 to 4 minutes to download a picture. I used to patiently wait.
Now if a picture doesn't appear in 5 seconds I am off to a different page, there are so many pages open at a time. I had the time I had all the patience in the world. Now I have the time but have no patience. I am the same person, no personality change. What has happened here is, my level of expectation has gone up. I no longer accept slow speed, its misery for me.

You buy a book, just off the shelf or recomended by a friend. You have already formed an opinion of it. If you think its a trash you would not buy it, you expect the book to be a good read. If it falls above your expectations its joy if it falls below your expectations its misery.

What is this level of expectation ? What decides it ?

Spielberg's ET was released here after a long wait, after running in remote places in Africa. By that time I had heard and read so much about ET. It recorded the highest gross collection ever. Standing in the queue in the hot sun with my friends on the day of its release my heart was pounding. We all were disappointed with the film. I did not like it. It was a sin to say that the film was bad. The film was not rusty rotten or decayed. It was the same film that was shown in Los Angelis or Istanbul and people loved it. My expections soared so high reading about it and waiting, that the film failed to satisfy me. There was nothing wrong with the film
Some thing was worng with me.

I'll continue tomorrow, its getting too long.
Blunt knife

27 December 2005

A breath taking journey

A new post at Blunt knife, took so long, I am just lazy.

A journey in to yourself is scary, but worth taking, I keep going knowing fully well that I am going nowhere and I have to come back to where I started, back to square one.
Foolish thing to do ?
time wasted ?
Energy wasted ?
You are a lot better than some one who has not moved out of the square one, who is too confident, who knows for sure that its a waste of time and who thinks he has all the answers.
The journey opens the windows
Fresh light, fresh knowledge
and the knowledge makes me aware of my ignorance.
What's the use of the knowledge which makes me aware of my ignorance
I have to know how much I do not know. Its pretty much the whole thing.
I have to keep going,
Yes the journey is worth taking.
No answers. No results.

26 December 2005

He takes you there....for a while.

I have said in some page that I may like my preferences but there is always some one out there who would treat my taste with utter contempt.

Rajni kanth is a south Indian film actor, I need a lot of courage and strength to watch him for more than ten minutes on a big or small screen.
I can describe him in one word,
I can see my friends punching my phone number now.

For those fortunate ones who have never heard of him, I'll give a brief introduction.
He is a superman a batman a spiderman, Evel Knievel, Bruce Lee, Rudolf Nureyev, Andrea Bocelli, Kimi Raikkonen all rolled into one, perhaps a bit more, I am inclined to add god to the list.
Enjoys phenomenal popularity. Here I am at a loss to describe his popularity in words. Perhaps gods don't enjoy such status.
This is India for you, more or less.

Apart from those who can afford, the poorest class of people blow more than a weeks wages to watch him hammer the bad guys and sing duets and dance with the leading lady in pouring rain, in the most exotic locations of the world. A man making an honest living carrying heavy load in the harbour, wearing a blue shorts green shirt and a red hand kerchief tied around his neck, waits in the queue in hot stinging sun for the whole day, blows his entire weekly wages, without caring for tomorrow, just to watch his hero toss the cigarette in the air, which lands right between his lips and light it with grand style.
The labourer or the rickshaw driver is in such a level of ecstasy that I can never dream or hope to reach anywhere near there. What I have been longing to achieve all my life, this labourer has experienced it.
He is already there.
He has reached.

I am groping in the dark, utterly confused, scared of the saints, scared of the people too sure of themselves, who think they have all the answers, people who are too sure of existence or absence of God, scared of people who say ' this is it '
I don't know where I stand.

Blunt Knife

21 December 2005

Good for you and little more

I couldn't write. The rain has dampened my thing in the head. Rain's been pretty uplifting usually but but ....

A very sweet lady from Canada whom I met thru this blogging wrote to me about pomegranate, since then I have been trying to write about it, but postponing for some silly reasons or the other. I told Puts to give me some write up and she forgot. I reminded her yesterday. idiot she is, wakes up at 2 in the afternoon. Now I don't know what to write about it. I can wait and write tomorrow, No, it has to be now, thats how I am.

Let me make an attempt to attract you to this fruit.

Pomegranate is a good fellow, feel sorry for him because he is not a very popular chap and generally not preferred over other fruits. I don't know the reason. I can give you my own reason though. I have never eaten a whole pomegranate all by myself, if you give me a pomegranate, I'll look at it smell it and put it in my bag, if I don't have a bag I'll give it back to you, too big for my pocket. Its a bit cumbersome to peel and remove all the membranes and bitter walls seperating the chambers. You have no idea how lazy I am.
Puts loves pomegranate. she calls me pompomee, don't know why, perhaps she is a pomegranate freak ? There is no point in asking her what she ate for lunch, you get the same answer every day, pomegranate and sprouts. I have stopped asking her. It tightens your skin she says, I believe her. she has a lovely skin, flawless.

Other virtues ? I forgot. Its a good thing, why its a good thing? its because I am telling you its a good thing. Please find out for yourself what the other virtues are, oh yea it has some medicinal properties used in ayurveda. If you know please tell me. I am just trying to attract you to this lovely looking juicy and tasty fruit.
Blunt knife

This is what wildpic added to my information
Thank you Suresh. Just awsome. !!!

allright ... u asked for it rauf ...
Pomegranate - 'Punica granatum', granatum means ‘Wonderful’.
Romeo and Juliet used to sing under the pomegranate tree.
Cleopatra used pomegranates to stain her lips red. Early lipstick!
The pomegranate has been used to symbolize the insolubility of marriage. For instance, it is used in Greek mythology by Hades to bind Persephone to him.

health benefits of pomegranate juice includes its effect on the prevention of prostate cancer.marinate meat - due to its content of proteolytic enzymes,it acts as a meat tenderizer.

Every pomegranate is composed of exactly 840 seeds ! (whew ! challenge this !)The inner membranes and rind are not generally eaten due to high tannic acid content, but they are useful as a skin wash. (is someone smiling ? ;))

Pomegranates are not a fruit that will ripen once picked, so once harvested, they will not continue to develop sugar. (bad for making alcohol then)Whole fruits can be stored for a month in a cool, dry area or refrigerated up to two months.

Heating about 10-30 seconds on high in the microwave for a regular size pomegranate will soften the skin. Score the skin from top to bottom in two places and peel it back. The seeds just wipe out as you pass your finger over them (oowe or what !)If you really want to avoid a mess - in managable sections, submerge the pomegranite in a big bowl of water. The seeds float to the surface. (;) for some people !)now ... all the reason for taking poms to new heights ... enjoy !

17 December 2005


Today is Moin's Birthday Moin is my nephew, love him so much.
He is 25 today

Best of all

When ever Suresh and I sit together, or spend time in the forest, we always talk about how weak and insignificant our human race is in the whole map of the universe. We always agree on its stupidity. Our planet itself would be hard to locate on the map. We both are firm believers of evolution.

We have often discussed and wondered, when we are evolved out of the best of natural selection, why we do not possess some of the amazing features and qualities of the animals. For instance a cat has 64 vertebrae and we have only 32 . Cat can survive a fall from a great height. Our eyes are not equipped with tapetum lucidum which helps in night vision (please correct me). We can't fly like a bird, We have no graceful speed of a panther leapord or a cheetah, or the strength and power of an elephant, grip of a lizard, or flexibility and defense mechanism of a snake. A chameleon's skin would be so fantastic, change colours at will in the court of law. We are not equipped with a radar or sonar detectors. Our vision and hearing are ridiculously limited. And finally a quality which we once had and lost, is the detection of natural disasters like the earth quake, flash floods or tsunami. Animals detect them in advance and escape to safety

In other words why humans are not batmen supermen or spidermen.
Ask any child, what he wants to be, perhaps as a child you imagined having additional features and powers too. We love reading mythological stories full of such characters.

The whole idea of creating the universe or life doesn't make any sense to me. Since we are here, without going into the reason why we are here, or seeking answers or enlightenment I laugh my life away resorting to clowning and try to keep myself in good humour and try to make the best of my existence on this planet. Live for the day with no savings for tomorrow. Not a wise thing to do.
Wisdom, yes I would trade all the wisdom in the world for a bit of commonsense.

When I tried to go into reason why we don't possess the best of the features and qualities of animals, I found a great deal of humour in it.

The nature or God if you like to call it, does not trust us. and please believe me this whole process of natural selection does not trust us either. Perhaps for right reasons. Nature or God considers us humans as complete idiots.
TESTED CONFIRMED STAMPED AND BRANDED IDIOTS, never to be trusted with additional features and powers. Nature or God trusts animals more. Animals don't need a hand book of the Ten commandments because they are wise and they are in total control their individual assets and qualities. We idiots so badly need a holy book in our hands to behave, telling us what to do and what not to do. We badly need the fear of law , fear of the society, fear of our own children and the fear of hell to control our thoughts actions and intentions. Even without the best of animal qualities, if we humans are let loose without control, it will not be very hard to imagine the consequences. Please don't laugh, we humans consider ourselves superior to animals, the lesser beings we call them.

Animals act only when necessary. survival and procreation are the only two things on their minds. They don't act for fun. A snake avoids biting, its first preference is always to escape without biting. Its venom is so precious that it injects a little bit, just enough to paralyse the victim. Death is often caused due to panic. They don't bite for the fun of it. Tigers leopards panthers hunt only when hungry, they don't go about killing all the weaker animals in the forest. They all are in total control of their qualities, and use them only when necessary. Except for whales in certain conditions, you'd never see animals ending their own lives. Have you seen any monkey doing yoga or meditation ? They don't need it.

As I had mentioned in one of my earlier blogs, the entire planet is run and managed by the female species. Things are different with us humans

Yea I'd like to have all those qualities. The thought of my neighbour or the people of a neighbour country aquiring these powers scares me to death. I want those features too. I want night vision, I want flexibility, to rob all the banks, I need venom, I would knock the door and bite the guys I hate. I would like to fly without a passport. I want to be a superman, a spiderman or a batman. Just imagine humans with animal powers features and qualities. There would be no life left on this planet. No wonder nature or God does not trust us. Its a good decision afterall. We have to live under some fear or the other and the fear of hell is really working.

Are we the best of all creations ? na... I don't think so.
Blunt Knife

15 December 2005


The other day I was reading ~j~'s blog where he says avoidance is the best form of self defense. He says
Avoidance in this sense is accomplished, not by specific techniques, but rather by states of being. To dramatically reduce the possibility of attack, and thereby the need to apply self-defense “fighting skills” one should be:

1) Alert
2) Humble
3) Peaceful
4) Law-abiding

I agree with him in total, great sense of humour there

Movies specially our Indian films are to be partly blamed. When you watch an action packed thriller you are often charged up. It is quite natural when you have just watched the hero bashing up 20 bad guys, exhibiting karate kungfu judo boxing all in one. I get charged up too, I want to bash up a couple of poor guys waiting at a bus stop for the crime of scratching their
heads and save the life of a non exixtent damsel in distress. Sense prevails when I realise I can get hammered by any girl as strong as Ashley Judd Winona Ryder or Julia Roberts.

Here the hero is smashing what looks like a windscreen of a car, probably the bad guy's, could be his own, you can never tell, these guys are crazy, they love smashing things and the audience love it, and it sells. The hero doesn't care about the consequences. If I think of doing the same, besides personal injury and a hospital bill, I have to worry about the bill for damage I caused, a lengthy court case and a couple of months in the chokey.
So sense should prevail. I better be a law abiding citizen.

In the late 70's I watched Gumball rally, After the show I grabbed my friend's hand and rushed out of the theatre, Whats the hurry ? my friend protested dragging along with me, he is a bit sluggish. I said let's watch some fun, some real life action, took him to the parking lot and waited. There it was, in just 2 minutes there were 5 or 6 accidents and many minor thumps thoomps. After watching the action packed Gumball Rally every driver coming out of the theatre was charged up. Bikes were racing GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOM GGRRRRRRRRRRRRROOM, there was deafening noise, everybody was Impatient and over excited, their engines screaming, One biker trying the wheely stunt and hit a wall. He was trying to impress his girl friend, poor thing fell down too, both luckily were not injured considering the impact.
Actually the girl fell off before her boyfriend hit the wall. What followed was absolute mayhem. DOONG DHOOMP TOONK TEENK,
cars hitting each other. Drivers came out of their cars and started bashing each other. The ladies came out of the cars too in an attempt to calm down their men. It was their loss. People went home after a couple of dents and scratches on their cars.

Angeldust says that the city of Bangalore is getting a new name, any idea what the new name is going to be ?
Blunt Knife

13 December 2005


Neil Diamond '12 Greatest Hits'
The moment I saw the poster I lost my peace
30 years ago?? or there about
I had to get that and I got it. It was in my hand, brand new silver jacket with dashing Neil Diamond's picture on it. Shiny record, not a scratch. What a feeling !!
Sometimes they dump demonstration record with lots of scratches on dumb guys like me, you have to check. I don't need any demo, I know what it is, I just grab and run, You have to check always which I never did, Always in a hurry. Wrapped in brown paper I came out of the music shop and waited for a bus which was least crowded,I had to protect the treasure in my hand, it was not a CD, a good old 33rpm Long playing record (LP). While waiting at the bus stop I took the record out of the wrapper many times and put it back. Had no patience, wanted to get back home fast. Got into a crowded bus, no elbow room, the only thing on my mind was protecting the record.
I panicked, I did not check if the record was Stereo, mono records were still on sale.
With a pounding heart I got off the bus, while crossing, in the middle of the road I opened the wrapper and checked,
yea it was printed there in small letters 'stereo'
I don't know how I reached home.
Time did not exist for me.
A bunch of friends were waiting.
They knew that I was coming home with Neil Diamond's new Christmas release. Clement snatched the record from me, (he was expelled from school for showing a knife to his teacher ). I have all kinds of friends, all ages. He placed the record on the turn table, mom made tea for all and we sat down
.'sweet caroline' the first number, Boy I was floating in the sky
and I am not even a Christian.
Talk to me about material happiness
I'll tell them go take a hike.

VATICAN CITY (Reuters) -- Pope Benedict has warned against rampant materialism which he said was polluting the spirit of Christmas-CNN
Do you think Christmas is celebrated by the Pope, cardinals, Bishops or the Nuns in the convent alone ?
More than the birth of Christ,
Christmas is all about giving.
Christmas is about sharing your joy
Christmas is about remembering the forgotton ones.
Christmas is awareness
Christmas is hope
Christmas is a smile.
Christmas breaks all the barriers of religion.
Christmas is also celebrated by the people who don't even know who Jesus Christ was.
Christmas is an opportunity to unite the people of the world
Christmas has gone beyond Christianity and has gone beyond the birth of Christ.
Yes, our world is far from perfect, but there is something called hope.
And Christmas gives it to you.

This is not about 25th of December. This is about the road which takes you there. The road to Christmas is more enjoyable and exciting than Christmas itself, where the planning, decorations, preparations shopping begins more than a month before. The road to Christmas generates phenomenal amount of business, directly or indirectly brings some prosperity even to people who are remotely connected. So what is the harm in commercialising the Santa ?

Material pollution, ..'polluting the spirit of Christmas'
In other words the Santa doesn't exist.
Yes Santa is casting a shadow over the birth of Christ, perhaps the Pope is worried about that.

Remove Santa from the scene, you see a bare colourless and a lifeless Christmas. This does not mean that people forget the very reason why they are celebrating in the first place. Every body is aware of this fact. If you want only spiritual happiness out of Christmas who is stopping you ? Nobody is forcing you to buy yourself a bottle of perfume, or a new pair of shoes. Don't spend a dime, just sit and pray but let the children have fun, they may be 50 years old. And Santa is a spirit which brings joy to all, he may be sponsored by SONY, So what ??

I don't have faith, I don't celeberate, but is is good to join the celeberation and share the joy. Even if I can't afford to buy anything, I love to see all the Christmas releases, all the decorations and preparation, Nice to watch shop displays, Its fun, and the goodies which I get from my kind neighbours and they share their joy and we share our joy on Eid or Diwali with them.

When you wear a new dress it is nothing less spiritual.
Buy a dress for some one who can't afford one, it is more spiritual.

Forgot forgot, I played santa once, that was my friend's Christmas party years ago.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change... the courage to change the things I can... and a red Ferrari. -Mr. Boffo

Blunt Knife

11 December 2005

December 8th

She hated loud music which was always on, She hated and objected to their posters all over the walls of my room. Mom complained to everybody who came to my house about my attitude and arrogance. One priest who came to see her said that there are evil spirits in my room.

1967 things went quiet after Sgt. pepper. I went quiet too.
I was 19. Thirteen years flew. I was going nowhere.

Mom was sick, bed ridden, I sat on her bed, She knew something seriously went wrong.

She asked what happened, I said Lennon died, he was shot.

"tera beedal ?' {your Beatle ? ) she asked, 
I said yes.
She placed her loving hand on my head and caressed my hair. She knew how I felt. By then I had a long and disheveled beard, jobless, aimless, I had just resigned my job.
December 8th 1980. I was 32.
Moin was born nine days later.

25 years now and it is still so fresh, all the major TV networks paid homage on Dec. 8th, they never forget each year. I wanted to write but did not feel like. I was confused. Still not sure if I am proud of his influence or ashamed of it. Life took a nose dive and it never took off, I remained aimless.

I doubt any one in history has influenced the world in the most passive manner the way Lennon did. I know that a lot better music came before and after Lennon.
If it was not music alone, then what was it ?
If not the music what really changed the world ?
I do not know. I really do not know.
It was like the mind broke off all its shackles and came out free. Eastern philosophy did not change him, he brought a revival in eastern thinking which was slowly dying under the impact of fast spreading western culture. All the swamis and guru's who were sleeping in relative obscurity, suddenly woke up and cashed in.
He did not come to India to revive anything, his presence did everything. He was blissfully unaware of the impact he would leave behind. And many Indians are not aware what really brought the change. 
Was this change any good ?
i do not know
No one was conscious of what really brought the change.

Like me there are millions of others who walked on the road with John Lennon beside them. He was not a guide but he was there in our lives, a very strange influence. I learnt nothing from him but he was all over me and millions like me.

If you admire some one please stop right there, don't go any further, it will hurt you. It was not a good idea reading Lennon's biography, there are many many of them. I still regret reading it.

8 December 2005

The Cave man

Take your Children for shopping, buy them some toys, your son picks up a gun, and your daughter invariably picks up a doll. I know your son wants to shoot down all the bad guys over there and the computer games offer him more violence.

Booza Tooza two cave men three million years ago.
Booza hunts and gathers food for his woman and children.
BOINK! Cave man Tooza clubs Booza and takes away his food.
Booza is pissed because this happens every day.
Booza Complains to the chief.
Tooza says I hungry I eat.
Chief says Booza food
Tooza says I hungry I eat.
This stealing Bad
What Bad ?
Stealing wrong bad, not good
what wrong what bad what good ? I hungry I eat.

Now you have to make Tooza understand what is right and what is wrong. He has a point, he was hungry and he ate. Poor guy does not know what is good what is bad or what is right and what is wrong.

Best way to make him understand is by cooking up a story, Tell him a story how somebody took food which was not his and he was struck by a lightning. Use the best of your imagination, add masala.

All our holy books are nothing but stories and stories.
Why not just give a book of rules ?
No it will not work. You have to make them understand, so give them stories along with the user manual.

After 4 million years we have crossed the usefulness of such holy books but unfortunately we still cling on to them. We don't mind insulting our intelligence and we are not ashamed to accept that we are still Booza and Tooza and we cannot behave without these holy books. We grow up reading them. Stories full of violence, chopping of heads, blood everywhere. Yes only the heads of bad guys were chopped because there were no lethal injections back then.

Please don't call me and say my religion does not advocate violence, mine is a religion of peace. Spare me please.
Which religion advoctes violence ?
They all talk of peace, all of them, with stories of war murder spilling of blood chopping of heads.

And please don't be surprised if your son picks up a gun in a toy shop.
Salute the toy makers, violence sells.

After 4 million years human mind may have evolved
but human nature remains the same.
Hi Mary Jo
Hi Booza
Hi Tooza
Blunt Knife

7 December 2005

Photo Blog

I don't know if I told you
I have this another blog thing going ? Blunt knife ?
Its a photo blog thing, no its not a photo blog,
blog blog ?? I am not sure what it is
But its a blog with pictures and lots of them.
And I give tips, what ever little I know
Oh yea I got it
Its a travel blog too
what else ?
Some times my mind refuses to move ??
I mean not out of my skull
that some times is today and now
Yea it goes out of my skull too.
Right now ??
I don't know what I am talking about ?
I am typing very fast, five words per minute
before my cat tries to catch my fingers

Please wake up early
You'd be missing a lot
How many sun rises have you seen in your life ?
I read a blog last night ?? yea last night.
where the person is happy that she's got good friends
She feels lucky, It was good to read
Its good to know some one is happy.
Half my friends wake up in the afternoon.

I forgot, I means forgot forgot
just click on the title of the blog
Title or the heading ?
what ever
or click on blunt knife below
It will take you to my other blog thing

I don't like this word blog or blogger
Blogger ? Yea I saw in my dream
People coming out of a theatre
big crowd, Somebody points at me and
shouts BLOGGER !!
I run
and they chase me, I try to run faster
but Its like I am running in slow motion
just like in the movies ??
I can hear thousand guys screaming behind me BLOGGER BLOGGER BLOGGER and they were getting closer and closer ??
I am running and running and running and not moving an inch.
To my horror I find I am wearing only a t shirt
ONLY A T-SHIRT. But I was wearing shoes thankfully. Nice shiny shoes well poslished, new very stylish shoes they were, bit too big for my feet though.

Angeldust ! Is this font and colour OK ? I have been trying different things buttoo I want to stick to black, bikkaas of pictures I means my pages have pictures, yea its a good idea, I'll say pages in future not blogs. Is it still too bright for you ?
Blunt Knife

6 December 2005

the Hills are alive : 40 years now

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Any time tell me to sing
I will sing with my flat tuneless voice

I remember each and every word
40 years !
Still remember standing in the queue early in the morning with my friends for the first show at 3 'o'clock on the first day of its release
I thought I'd be the first there, found a big crowd standing in the queue already, I was not the only passionate chap in chennai.

Blunt Knife

5 December 2005

Big Money

Things just happen and we have no control over it.

You are here reading my blog. You are here, and alive.
I have been into near fatal accidents many times.
I escaped because I left five seconds late or five seconds too early.
If I have any knowledge of what is waiting for me on the road I would never step out of my house.
If You know the future, things will come to grinding halt.
This element of uncertainty is what the life is all about.

Why do we ask questions, why do we seek enlightenment ?
One fundamental reason is insecurity. There is no way of knowing our future.
This is big business, big money.
Our insecurity takes us to diffrent Guru's, and Swamis, and they cash in. Your insecurity is money for them.
This includes the Vatican or Thirupati Temple and many others,
they are rich.
Your insecurity makes them rich.

For 2 days I have been cleaning up things after the rains, books and my music collection mostly. After a long time found myself playing two songs over and over again, 'Noah's Dove' Natalie Merchant's haunting voice, and Jamie O'Neil 'There is no Arizona'

Such pain in her voice ?? I don't know how to say it.

I have very limited knowledge of English,

some times I don't find right words to express what's on my mind,

Urdu being my language. I think in Urdu and write in English ' Dard bhari Aawaaz' or 'Soz' . Please help me I don't know how to say that in English.

Then there is this song which I heard on the radio a couple of years ago. I don't know the title and I don't know the name of the singer.

I'm at a pay phone just outside Charlotte

I just stopped to call to let you know I'm running late

yea I am pretty sure I've got the right direction

exit 29, just off the interstate........

Is there a place where I am not taken for granted

and I don't have to spend the nights alone

and I need a place where he can't hurt me any more

some place.. .. thats no place like home ...

This song moved me to tears. It's about some one leaving home.

This is one of the many reasons why I pour my frustrations in my blogs, thrashing beliefs, society, God. I am a blunt knife, doesn't cut anything.

When You hear a beautiful song and you don't know the name of the singer, you can't sleep.

The internet has come to my rescue before, like I came to know the title and the lyrics of Trisha Yearwood's 'I don't paint myself into corners any more' There's a whole lot of treasure in country music out there.

No other search has frustrated me more. I had given up a couple of times before.I stopped my cleaning leaving my room in a bigger mess and went after the song. I stumbled upon a site where you can key in your query and wait for some body to respond.
Its discussion forum too

One heading was staring at me, I clicked on it


Its about a song, perhaps recorded in the 50's or early 60's allegedly sung by Johnny Cash, used to like him in my younger days.

I have no courage to post the title and the lyrics here in my blog.

In response to a query one Ms. Judi McKnight furnished the lyrics without any malice, and with apologies and hoping that it doesn't offend any one. She furnished the lyrics because some one like me asked for it.

What followed was a flood of abuses, which turned very obscene as the discussion went on, and Ms. Judi McKnight maintained her dignity right through.

Views of some people were shocking, I was very upset, sad and angry.

What ever the level of your joy ecstasy or enlightenment may be, there is always some one out there to put a hole in it and throw you back to to the earth with a bone shattering thud.

Just as I was posting this blog, I received a mail from Ms. Judi McKnight, giving me the name of the singer. Hard to imagine her efforts trying to get me the information on the vaguest or the thinnest of clues. very sweet of her.

Thank you Judi. I can sleep now.

Blunt knife

3 December 2005


This may be an eye sore,
believe me, you may not be aware that these bill boards give you a good feeling that things are going alright.
These bill boards are a part of the marketing urging you to buy their product. But when bombs are falling around you and bullets are flying everywhere, you hardly think of painting your walls or buying new furniture. You would just hope and pray that your children come back home alive. There is a shift in your priorities.
Survival becomes every thing for you.
You will think of marketing your product only under peaceful conditions. Otherwise these bill boards become meaningless and the marketing impossible.

When do you think of enlightenment ?
Only under peaceful conditions that includes your personal health.
You don't think of enlightening yourself when you are sick or under the threat of bombs dropping around you.
Gautam Buddha was not suffering himself,
he saw death and suffering around him, which made him ask questions.,
Had he been suffering from chronic stomach aches due to peptic ulcers, we wouldn't have any Buddhisam today.

There is no formula or a particular path to enlightenment.
My paradise would suffocate you. What enlightens me may depress you.
We have our own ways of liberating ourselves. Even if you attain Nirvana, nothing is going to change.
There is no enlightenment for an Iraqui or an Afghan.

This used to be my table, now discarded
There is nothing unsual here

All it needed was a bit of moisture, life springs on it. There was no life on it for 20 years
Take a closer look

I never noticed it myself.

Please stop for some time for a closer look
You may find something enlightening right under your nose.

Blunt Knife